Sleepwalk

For as long as I can remember, I have been a sleepwalker. My parents have told me stories from when I was very young, how they would find me stumbling around in the kitchen during the middle of the night. Just picture Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly in that scene from Step Brothers.

I’ve always thought that my sleepwalking was kinda fun. If I could only somehow control it and use it for good. Imagine how productive I’d be if I could build a house for the poor while asleep.

The best part of sleepwalking is when I catch myself in the middle of sleep doing something. I love when I find myself turning on a light in the bathroom or walking around in my room. But that isn’t always the case. Sometimes I don’t catch myself in the act and have to resort to looking for clues the next morning. I can’t tell you how many times I have woken up and found that I have moved my bed or hidden something on my desk.

For the longest time I kept a sleep journal where I would document all the things that I did in the middle of the night.

Here’s a sleep journal entry from August 18, 2008:

On Sunday night I caught myself sitting up in bed holding a pillow that didn’t have a pillowcase on it. I looked around my room and found the pillowcase in the middle of the floor. Apparently at some point in the middle of the night, I took the pillow case off and threw it across my room.

On Monday night things got even more action packed.

I had a “dream” where I sleepwalked into my closet, thinking I had to put on a Phoenix Suns shirt that was folded away in my dresser drawer.

Not sure why I had to get that specific shirt, but somehow I managed to find it. Once I had the shirt I tried to put it on, but I realized that I was already wearing a shirt.

The funny thing is, I don’t wear a shirt to bed. So at some point in the night I went to my closet, found a shirt and put it on. Now, I was back in the closet trying to put on another shirt.

When I went to put on the second shirt, I felt a sharp pain in my left shoulder. The pain woke me up and I realized that I was in my closet wearing not one, but two shirts.

And to top it all off, I had somehow hurt my shoulder. That means that I had done even more in my sleep that night, some of which had caused physical pain.

Now that I was awake, I took off both shirts and walked back to bed. On my way back to bed, I found that my bed sheets and pillowcases were crumpled up and tossed on the floor.

Apparently sleepy Adam doesn’t like pillowcases.

I wish that this story has some really powerful meaning, like we all need to stop sleepwalking though life, but it doesn’t. I just thought you might enjoy laughing at the crazy things I do while asleep.